old_bridge_NJ_5756_Meeting_20231114_192400.mp4

Council Person [00:00:00] I was asked to comment. If you could please stick to the 3 minutes. Respect each other and listening to each other. We're not asking to agree with each other, but these hear each other out and we're going to here this out so we do not have to break this meeting and start over.

Tina [00:00:21] Hi, my name is Tina G Gerard. I've been a resident of Oak Bridge my entire life. My mom was a resident of Madison Township. I have a son that's currently in high school. I have many nieces, nephews and cousins that also went Old Bridge High School. I can only speak from what I know in my own life. My sister, who's my other half, a literal ... Dream, came out when she was in her mid-twenties. My parents would never, ever, ever. And, she knew that, would never do anything but love her. But it took her that strength to find that strength in order for her to say it out. And now that she's said it out now, she's the same person she always was only better.

Tina [00:01:31] My nephew, who is also gay, when he was in fourth grade, said he wanted to commit suicide because he didn't understand why everyone was making fun of him for his backpack and the things that he liked. Now, he graduated high school last year. He is an amazing young man. Amazing young man. And I also have a cousin who I watched grow up who's also gay and went to this high school. In order for people to be able to get themselves ready to tell the world their own personal, beliefs, not beliefs... their own personal what they are. I never had to tell anybody I was straight.

Tina [00:02:37] Unfortunately, I'm straight. If it was a choice? ... So I'd like to know just in general for people think about this. When did you know you were straight? Do you know your straight? Was there something that went off in your head that said, You know what? I like women, no wait I like men. It is what it is. A lot of people have said about treatment that kids are getting gender treatment while other kids. You need to be 17 years old with a parent's consent in order to get any type of drugs, surgery or anything.

Mariah [00:03:48] Can you hear me now? All right, good. My name is Mariah. I've been a resident for over 40 years, so yes there are black people in Old Bridge. I'm a product of the Old Bridge School sustem from the Elementary school, to middle school, to high school, along with seven cousins. I have a few children who also go through the school not to mention, I'm now a grandma. I also go to college football basketball track for boys and girls. I am in even completed my Sacrimental ... as well as my mom teachers CCD their.

Mariah [00:04:26] I give you my background so that you know I have been fully invested in our town for the last couple of decades, as well as invested in mine and all the children of our town, education and school system, just like the rest of the town, it's residents and their kids. I stand before you tonight to request for policy 5756 not to be repealed. It is a communication plan that was put in place by Governor Christie back in 2017. It was created as a policy to protect and address the needs of transgender students and to assist schools in establishing policies, procedures that ensure a supportive and nondiscriminatory environment for transgender students.

Mariah [00:05:04] It is just that, a communication policy. It is not a policy contrary to what many have spoken before in front of the BOE of those that believe that allows teachers to give children medications or offer therapy or help children pursue surgeries or transitioning or to even persuade or help the child along with their transitioning.

Mariah [00:05:23] If you are a parent at OB and you know, nurses can't even give her children Tylenol without permission. So this policy is to safeguard transgender children. It helps teachers and school administration with a plan of how to communicate with children who have a certain their gender identity. This is not all the school staff and teachers are keeping a secret from me policy. It is a protection policy for most parents who have an open communication with your children. Love them unconditionally. It will not harm them in this policy does not pertain to you. This policy is to protect the transgender children that if or because they can't be open with their parents for fear of retaliation, abuse or being kicked out of their homes. This protects them.

Mariah [00:06:06] Unfortunately, some of the parents that are here wanted to repeal the policy or those who have been known to be anti-lgbtqia+. So we need to address the elephant in the room. If you repeal this policy, what safety measures and safeguards do you put in place for the transgender children? For their safety? For those who don't know how to use them, because it is 1.6 million that have been kicked out of those for coming forward. So my thing is, keep the policy for transgender protection and include a safeguard measure that if the parent questions their child's identity or the child is ready to share with the parent. The measures were put in place that there's no harm, no violence or anything happens to those children.

Audience [00:06:55] Can we keep it quiet in the back?

Nina [00:07:04] my name is Nina ?, and I'm going to start with equality and inclusion. This is Old Bridge, we all know this. So don't send the policy 5756. I'm going to continue with Mariah's speech over here because she only had 3 minutes. Because for the most part now they released the violence. Those who think that this is over, the young brother kids in a home.

Nina [00:07:33] She has, Mariah has an experience this. I, by the way, also have a child in mt house whomst is gay because they don't go. Home because they're afraid to go home.

Nina [00:07:45] This team, this team was what this team that Mariah was talking about was put out of the woods for two weeks. We're asking you to keep the policy for transgender protection and include a safeguard measure that if a parent questions their children's identity or the children, is ready to share with their parents that measures are put in place so that no harm will come to the child or worse, that they will be put out of their home. We have learned from other towns that eliminating the policy will not only lead to lawsuits, but not protecting these children will be lost in the lawsuits, the deaths of children and injuries and everything else. And what was going to happen with the money, and the costs of the lawsuits for our town. I mean, we've already lost money in the safe. It was it was $12 million by the state cut our budget. And then what is it going to cut our budget with the 5756 if you rescinded it? How much money are we going to lose? Is anybody thinking about that?

Nina [00:08:42] The attack on this policy can ... In a way that everybody knows in this room. It's been used for six years and it's just a gimmick to attack our town school system. They're just already they attack our the teachers, the education system, classes, health and sex ed and now you're attacking this policy. What's going to be next? Book banning? I'm sorry to ask again. Please protect our children. Please Protect transgender children, because nobody else may be.

Nina [00:09:11] As BOE members, you were elected to protect our schools and education system and protect every child. Not just a few children, not just the select children, not the children and parents who share the same views as every each of you. But all the children and parents in the education system of our town is important. Protect our kids, protector the policy.

Nina [00:09:46] Hi, I am Diane. I am a nurse and a mother of three in the Old Bridge school system. My oldest, I had to get permission from all of them to be allowed to speak, my oldest is transgender and recently she transitioned a long time ago. She would come out to friends and she felt comfortable. She would open up to her friends and tell this was transgender. But recently, within the last three weeks, someone outed her. To what? To her felt like everyone. And recently, she has experienced someone in the cafeteria standing up and pointing at her and yelling, You're an effing man without the abbreviation. She had someone at kickball called her it, and that thing, she's dealt the bulling [and] outing. Those people are bullies. But the person who outed her, outing is bullying. You're opening the person up to this unsafe environment mentally.

Nina [00:10:47] And so if you're opening up a teacher or a counselor to go against the student's wishes and tell a parent, I would say that's bullying. I think you're opening yourself up for litigious action in that in the bullying respect as well. To go to talk about parental rights. I'm not trying to be offensive, but I think it's selfish because I don't think this is about you. I think you're probably really supportive parents. I don't think this is about your children, most probably. This is about a really small, small, small percentage of children that really need to be protected. And if we're not going to protect them, nobody is. And I just, I also want to go towards the grooming that I hear about because I was personally accused of making my child transgender and I can't even get my children to brush their teeth. Thank you. I really hope you keep this polict to protect my children and protect other children.

Bob Hartman [00:12:00] Can you guys hear me? I'm a resident of Oak Bridge since 1971. Enter the school system. [name] Bob Hartman. Some of the teacher wish I wasn't in the school system. But I was here no less. But again, it's just very simple. I've read the the policies and reied to I understand it the best I could. And it's really very simple to just have open dialog between the kids and the parents, not just the kids in the teachers and hiding stuff from the parents.

Bob Hartman [00:12:29] It's just very simple. I mean, just for the whole founding of our Nation for about 250 years, it's been that way. You should continue that way. And secondly, these children are kids, right? They they're not making decisions, at everything at this age. We know that. That's why we have all these things you can do, like the gentleman here said before. You can't go to an R rated movie. PG 13, you can't play school sports without a parents voucher. You can't get a job without a parents voucher. You essentially can't go on a school trip with other parents voucher. Or Anything. And yet we want to say that this kid at 14 years old make a decision on what is the best thing for but not tell the parents. It's very simple. Just have open dialog with everybody. Just keep it open. 99% of parents are safe and everything is good. And I'm not trying to bad mouth these people here, but soon as this guy comes here and shares his heart and has a little bit of trouble what they do? They laughed and mocked him? So this is supposed to be the loving crowd? As soon as this guy hit trouble they just laughed and shouted and mocked. So who's the people should be protected from? Right? They showed they're right.

Bob Hartman [00:13:32] So again, let the parent be completely involved in their kids lifes. And teachers should not have this responsibility. Just teach our kids, that that you are here to do. You don't want to be involved in this? Just teach your kids to let the parents raise their children. It's their kids. They pay the bills, they cloth them, they feed them. They do everything for them. They drive them to here they drive them to there. I'm driving all over the place with my kids. Okay, so the parents raised their kids. Thank you.

Chris [00:14:02] Hello? Hello. My name is Chris Brownport and I'm a graduate of Oakridge High School Year 2008. I am currently a department head at the organization that I work for. I work and maintain the computers for a library in New Jersey.

Chris [00:14:23] I don't bring this up to gloat. I bring this up to say that my first professional experience was in Old Bridge High School with my teachers who I felt I could trust. Learning to trust your colleagues, learning to trust the people that are around you is essential for the rest of your life.

Chris [00:14:50] Making it so that our children cannot trust their colleagues, their teachers means that we are stepping back our responsibility to them. They need to be able to develop the relationships with their colleagues that will set them straight for the rest of their lives. Please, I implore the board to maintain this policy. Trust your children to make the decisions that they need to make to accept themselves for the rest of their lives. Thank you very much.

Jacob [00:15:41] Hi. Jacob Pender. Rutgers. New Brunswick.

Jacob [00:15:44] I'll start with a little fact check on what the Association of American Physicians and Surgeons is, which is something that's been quoted before. The APS as it is label is a politically conservative nonprofit association that promotes conspiracy theories and medical misinformation, such as HIV AIDS denialism, the abortion breast cancer hypothesis, whatever that is, and vaccine and mockism connections. So as much as that may sound like a real scientific organization, it is not. Is a nonprofit, just as many are. Many nonprofits have affiliations like that. But I was speaking tonight on 5756, which is not a policy that goes against parental rights. There's a lot of calls that goes hand in hand with parental rights as a policy that actually supports parental rights. This may surprise all of you, but in policy 5756 is repealed your teachers may out, students to their parents. You know what that does? That takes away a moment that students have that children have to come out to their parents. And every single LGBTQ person that I know has a coming out story about them, coming out to their parents on their own terms. However, if you ever take that away from them, it will never not be the students coming out to their parents. It'll be the teacher coming out to the parents for the students. That takes away that moment that that parent has with that child.

Jacob [00:17:09] Another thing that was said tonight was that, give me one second because I mistakenly turned off my phome, that moms and dads are not the problem. They love their children. Anyone who says that I would like them to look in the eyes of a transgender student was thrown out of their house by their parents and tell that to them because not all parents are like that. Most of them are and that's why we have policy 5756 because we know that the parents, the parents who love their children, who love them unconditionally, those children will come out to those parents before they come out to anyone. Why don't you try to tell a teacher and they've known for less than nine months over the parent who's raised them and loved them their entire life. Why do they come home first to a teacher who has dozens, if not hundreds of students? Why would they do that? There's only one reason, and that means they're not ready. The parent may not be ready. The student may not be ready. And that's why we have a policy 5756 to protect parental rights.

Jacob [00:18:12] I will end with this. What does parental rights look for everyone in this room? What does it look like when you're no longer a parent because your child has committed suicide? What does parental rights look like then?

Christopher [00:18:34] Christopher ?. I am an Old Bridge resident for about 20 years. A little more than that, and I have two daughters in the public school system here.

Christopher [00:18:43] And so this is hard. You know, we hear these kind of policies. I really want to talk a little bit more about really the general concerns here. So I want to know when the public school becomes an exceptable place to explore one's sexuality. And why is it so important to everyone here that people come from all over the state to these meetings? And want to make sure that sexuality is affirmed. Doesn't make sense to me. I just want to ask that question, why do we have to support the sexualization in our public institutions? Why is this supposed to be acceptable.

Christopher [00:19:14] Gender dysphoria as a mental illness. No one is denying that. How is the therapy for this illness to affirm and enables that mental illness? Every other mental illness is the goal is to reintegrate. Correct. Help them see the differences about what they've done wrong, where they're going wrong, and adjust. And then you get the to introduce in society.

Christopher [00:19:37] I know you guys don't want to hear that. You got this is a problem. You want to keep your sexual deviation. I get it. It's fine. So, yeah. So for me, the ... Does not fix the issue of suicide ideation. In fact, the research actually shows that there's minimal to any change in the risk. So other ... Other mental illnesses through affirmation still sustain. So I hear a lot of people here tonight behind me, for example, in support of keeping this policy wanting us to accept this illness as okay. And I'm hearing ad hominem attacks from you and from others out here about, you know, what we're doing here and so forth calling us bigots and so forth. Listen, we love everyone. We're parents. We love everyone but we h... Do not like the behavior...

Christopher [00:20:32] Sorry you're right, this is a board meeting. So everyone here is to make their voice heard to everyone. So we have parents who are sick of the sexualization of our children. That's really what this comes down to. We are sick of all the sexual deviations and pushing our kids through social media and that it is ideology and ideology onto our children. It's indoctrination. That's why they're all here. We would like to see the measures of protection as something more akin to yesteryear, where we encourage abstinence. Why are we talking about abstinence? Why isn't this talk about sexualization? I get it. I was a teenager, wants to but gosh, I wish I had someone telling me, keep it in my pants. Okay, here. Last ... We encourage them putting aside these strange ideas about what sex is and what it's all about and waiting until they are older to help the young people, that's a better decision for them. So I'll leave you with that. I think that's what the policy should look like.

Jeet [00:21:33] Good evening. The board. My name is Jeet Chakraborty, and I have been a resident of Old Bridge since 2002.

Jeet [00:21:41] A little something about me, I was going to the Old Bridge school system. The subject that I liked the most was history, and I was blessed with really great history teachers, in fact, one of them is actually sitting in the back right now. Now, there's a funny thing about history. It's the it's written by the victors. But it remembers the victims.

Jeet [00:22:05] History, remembers the Jews who were slaughtered under Hitler's regime. History remembers the LGBT people who were slaughtered during the Stonewall riots. History remembers the people who have been oppressed and have been abused. And history teaches us to not let those things repeat. Unfortunately, we are currently living in an era where history is repeating itself.

Jeet [00:22:39] Now. I want to encourage everybody to just think long term for a moment. Don't think about next school year. Don't even think about. The next election cycle. Think five, maybe ten years down the line. Now, everybody who has spoken out against policy 5756. Again, it's a changing time. There's a lot of new ideas out there and it feels like there's just so much happening all at once. It's scary. And I genuinely do believe that these people coming out speaking against policy 5756 do love their children from the bottom of their hearts. However, I'm finding that that love seems to be tainted by fear and a desire for something normal in a crazy and ever changing world. Now to all of you who are against this policy, the vast majority of you will never have to deal with a gay or transgender child.

Jeet [00:23:44] Your children will have gay and transgender friends, and by being against this policy, you're creating an environment in your homes where they know they're not safe to bring their friends to your house. In five, maybe ten years down the line. The people who are against this policy may be resented by the very children they're seeking to protect. Furthermore, I know some people on this board actually intend to use the school board as a springboard to higher office. Let me ask you this. Do you want your opposition to this policy to be used as a bludgeon against you by your opponents later down the line? Because let me tell you one thing.

Glen [00:24:57] My name is Glen ? , and I appreciate the extra time to be able to speak. I did not come here planning to speak, but. I can't. Not say something.

Glen [00:25:09] There is a grain of ignorance going on here. That this law is about the child sexuality. This law is about protection. This law is not about loving parents with loving homes who bring their children to errands and can talk to them about anything. This law is about the one child who can't go home. And every parent sitting here, I have no doubt is loving. And you are in this room because you care deeply about your children and about their experience in school. But don't be naive to think that every child in this high school goes home to the same kind of parents as you.

Glen [00:25:56] It could be your neighbor. It could be somebody around the block that that house in the name of normal, in the name of whatever they consider God, is capable of putting their child out for being queer, for not following the norm that they want them to be.

Glen [00:26:16] So when the school takes responsibility for outing the child before they are ready, before they are strong in their skin, then how can you be sure? That that child shows up for school inspection because she doesn't know. Nobody knows what happens in someone's home and in someone's experience. And trust me when I tell you that no child signs up to be transgendered, to be queer, no one is enticed to live in this discomfort. It is very difficult to be someone different, to feel different in your skin. And you go to school surrounded by people who are normal. Nobody volunteers for that.

Glen [00:27:06] Please keep a child's security in mind before you send them home. And giving their parents information that they know in their hearts, their parents aren't going to be able to respect. Ensure these kids come to school safely. Make sure they go home okay. And they come back the next day feeling secure. Thank You.

Alison [00:27:30] I'm Alison Parker. I've been an activist for 50 something years.

Speaker [00:27:47] I'd like to start by saying sexual deviation is a pejorative. I like to point out to you that if you've listened to everyone that spoke, hoping that this gets repealed. I would like you to imagine being there child. And I would like you to imagine that you, on the inside, do not match you on the outside, whether it is a genetic anomaly, regardless of what it is. Because I'm looking at some guys who I know that there's there's no way I'm going to tell you, put on a skirt. like you feel like you should be in a skirt and you're a Kid. And some of these people who love their kids or are their parents.

Speaker [00:28:35] And we're saying that kid who comes to school and feels safe with a teacher who is just struggling to find their way. We're going to call some of these people this evening and tell them, and then we're going to hope that they don't put that kid out. And if they do put that kid out or ... that kid does suicide. It's going to be behind the decision you're making this evening. And if you save one kid, you save the world. So when you do this ... do I one to save a kid who's going to go home and be on the streets or suicide or be on Jordan's unit? Thank you for your time.

Council Person [00:29:27] Thank You. I want to thank the public for their bravery to get up and speak. It's very difficult. We appreciate your passion. This concludes the public speaking. We are going to open up, an opportunity for the board to discuss. To give our input. Just so you can hear our views.

Council Person [00:30:07] ...

Council Person [00:30:10] It would seem redundant to highlight a policy that's been in force since 2014 and revised in 2019, that hasn't disrupted our child's education, hasn't caused any social disorder, and according to our HIV reports, there's been very little to no activity. So I attribute that to the administration ... the district. Some say it's luck. I advocate that you make your own luck. But our school system isn't a working rehabilitation center for our children. Life decisions such as gender selections should be needs to be collaborative with parents, guardians, and counselors. Not on the backs of our teachers.

Council Person [00:30:49] The number one priority is safety. Safety for all, and some of the high points on 5756 were not discussed. Okay, so with that, I'm going to ask to revise policy 5756 on important issues.

Council Person [00:31:09] Number one, use of facilities. We need to have a safe designated space for all children, transgender, even since there are no transgender. But we need to have a safe space, i.e. bathrooms and locker rooms, not giving access of choice.

Council Person [00:31:25] Number two, participation in sports, not being able to participate in a sport of choice based on gender selection. It all goes back to saying, I just disagree with that. I mean, I look at the case of Lia Thomas the swimmer. Broke records of females, was able to participate in a female sport. It's not so much given the ability to swim even with children, you just damaging the hopes of women who are trying to achieve greatness in their sport.

Council Person [00:32:00] Students records. Not keeping 2 sets of student records for identity purposes. I believe that's a safety factor. Imagine being blindsided as a parent, picking up your child, and then at that point you find out they're being victimized by another name. I personally understated.

Council Person [00:32:18] And then we talk about parent notification. I know that's a hot topic, but any changes in student records, a parent needs to be notified. That brings me to policy, 9240. That was not ... But we didn't give out ballots. And policy 9240 is the right of parents. And I'm ... excerpts from it.

Council Person [00:32:40] The board believes that the interests of the child are best served by the continuing involvement of all parents in the child's life and will be. The board will presume that each natural adoptive parent or legal guardian of a pupil enrolled in this district positions full parental rights and access to the pupil and information about the pupil. The board directs the school administrators to accommodate the needs of both parents and legal guardians from access to the child to the child's teachers and information about their child. This notion that if you ask information about the child, the administration school cannot deny you that. You can have .. Open school last night or parent teacher for the school. My daughter got high honor roll that's her plug for tonight, but I didn't go to ask about her grades. I asked about her behavior, about how she interacts with her kids and respect for teachers. So I was more concerned about her well-being as a person as opposed to education. That's something that we all do. So policies are a living document. Again, this thing hasn't been touched in ten years. But although our system is not currently compromised, policies need to be set for the near future. Success is not by design. It is by design is not by chance. So I need to make a motion to revise that policy and all sorts of other topics. Thank you.

Council Person 2 [00:34:27] So I talked a little bit about this in the last meeting. I want to say tonight is everyone in this room believes in parental rights and fueling policy 5756 involves a moral dilema and underscores the problem between parental rights and the well-being of the child. The idea is to ensure that parents have the autonomy to raise their children in a way that aligns with their values and beliefs, but within the boundaries set by society to safeguard a child's welfare. It's important to note that sacrificing any child to any form of harm is ethically unacceptable. Especially when we are aware that these situations do and continue to exist. The well-being and safety of LGBTQ students. Every student, even one student, should be a top priority, and their rights to a safe and nurturing environment are paramount. In any society. There are legal and ethical limits on parental rights to protect children from harm. Policy 5756 exists just to do that.